Zilch, Zero, Nada, None. That is the number of pictures you'll see on this post. Why? Because that is the number of photos I bought last week at JCPenney Portrait Studios.
After giving all three girls a bath, taking a shower myself, brushing hair, getting clothes on, making lunches and getting out the door on time, we arrived at JCPenney early for our portrait session. I was hoping to get a few group pictures for Joe. It's our annual Valentine's Day gift to give Joe pictures of all of his girls. We were snowed in when I would normally be getting the photos taken, so we settled for a later version of the annual pictures.
After waiting for an hour and 15 minutes in the waiting area where the only toys were a box of colors with no coloring sheets (we did eventually get some upon inquring), we finally made it into the studio to have our pictures taken. Let me just say that I do NOT have high expectations for pictures of my 3, 2, and 1 year old. I know we're a tough group to photograph, so I don't expect much. However, I do expect a picture. Just ONE picture to turn out nicely (by nicely I mean at least one child smiling and/or looking at the camera). Especially when you're taking single pictures of my 1 year old and 3 year old who are happily smiling for you. Surely you can get a good picture of them, right? Theia, I know, is a different story as she would not cooperate on any front. But Xandra, who was sitting nicely, listening and smiling on command. No good picture? Please tell me this was a horrible joke.
So, after 2 and 1/2 hours at the portrait studio, I left with NO pictures. None. All I had to show for our troubles was a wasted morning, three cranky kids, and one VERY cranky mom. It's a good thing it was naptime when we got home, because we ALL needed one.
Later that day when the manager of the portrait studio called to inquire about my appointment, I shared with her my experience. She coaxed me into coming back for a photoshoot in which she herself would take the pictures. After a hefty discount and a promise for no wait time, she prevailed and we gave it another try. All of this, despite promises to myself earlier in the day that we were NEVER doing pictures again.
After another, more successful try, we will soon have some good pictures for Joe's picture frames at work. Better than the pictures, is the story that I will always think of when I look at them: a crazy, wasted morning at the portrait studio. I'm sure someday it will be funny. For now, the thought of it still makes me want to poke my eyeballs out.